talkin’ ’bout: g-g-ghosts!

Okay, let’s try something a little different …

So what’s the deal with ghosts? (Hard to *not* read that in a Seinfeld voice.) Are they real? Do they exist?

As most of you know via Damned Connecticut, it’s a subject of which I have pretty good knowledge, if no personal experience. But that’s okay—as my “ghost” collaborator Steve likes to say, “Everyone has a ghost story, if not their own, then someone they know, be it a friend, family member or co-worker.”

That certainly seems to be the case, as the idea of ghosts goes all the way back to the very beginnings of human consciousness. Every race, every culture, every nation on the planet has some sort of concept of them, be it gentle souls passing over to the next plane, or tragic and confused entities trapped in a wishing well on Earth trying to find their way to whatever it is that comes “next,” or vengeful spirits hell-bent on doing harm to those left behind.

In a way, the idea that our soul somehow survives beyond the end of our physical bodies is a tantalizing one—who doesn’t want to believe that they live forever once they shuffle off this mortal coil, that they continue to exist in some other form? If we can then exist beyond the end of their bodies, it (somewhat) logically follows that there might be evidence of it, fleeting glimpses of another existence that we call ghosts.

I don’t understand why the common reaction to the idea of a ghost is fear. As far as I can tell, there’s never been any actual evidence in the history of humankind of someone actually, directly being harmed by a ghost. Now, has fear of an otherworldly entity caused injury? Yes, from serious heart attacks to inadvertent self-injury while fleeing a supposed ghost, people have been hurt. But as far as a knife-wielding specter really breaking through the spiritual plane to inflict pain or death, there’s no true documented examples. (And yes, I’m counting those stories of ghost hunters being slashed by unseen forces. I’m not saying that they haven’t sustained injuries, I just tend to think those are more physical manifestations of pyschosomatic stress, i.e. injuries—like stigmata—that spontaneously appears due to internal mental stress.)

I am also amused by the whole argument around the idea that despite the abundance of ghost-hunting TV shows, groups and other organizations, no actual evidence has been produced. Ghost believers will passionately tell you that there’s mountains of proof, from photos and videos to EVPs (electronic voice phenomena) and metered readings. Skeptics will counter with just as much zeal that all of that stuff can be (or is) faked and unreliable. Ghosts, at times, can be polarizing.

Quick: Who’s the most famous ghost?

The “Holy Ghost” of Christian fame? Jacob Marley, who marshals the spirits who torment Ebeneezer Scrooge in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol? Patrick Swayze’s disembodied, pottery-making shade from the eponymous movie? Poor, gentle Casper, who is sentenced to an eternity seeking friendship yet only finds misunderstanding and ridicule? (Although he’s on my list, it’s not the funky spirit of 1776 …) In terms of “non-fictional” ghosts, I always think of The Brown Lady of Raynham Hall; the most popular one I know of locally is The White Lady of Union Cemetery, although there are plenty of others.

That reminds me of one aspect of the whole ghost phenomena I don’t quite understand—with generally no physical evidence, and usually less than a second or so that most eyewitnesses describe during one-on-one encounters, how can anyone ever positively identify a ghost? I’m not talking about vague names like the White Lady, but when someone definitely says, “That’s the ghost of Alice Conley wandering the halls of The Yankee Pedlar Inn.” I mean, unless the ghost manifests a voice and says, “Hey everybody, it’s me, Alice,” how do you know? Wishful thinking, I suppose, more times than not.

Sometimes I wonder if there are ghosts, are they constantly around us? Do they watch us engaged in mundane tasks, eternal voyeurs longing to be among the living once again? If so, this truly bothers me—I don’t like to think that my dearly departed grandmother is watching me when I’m on the toilet; nor do I want to entertain the notion that someone like Jeffrey Dahmer is floating around in my bathroom as I take a shower.

Another thing I don’t understand about the idea of ghosts is why, if once unencumbered of a body, a spirit would choose to spend the rest of eternity hanging around one particular spot. I mean, if I was free of my body, I wouldn’t hang around some “spooky” broken-down house at the edge of town for the next few hundred years; I’d travel the entire universe, enjoying the many wonders of worlds currently unknown. Which reminds me: Do aliens have ghosts? What about supposed crashed UFOs—are there phantom grays aimlessly wandering the sands around Roswell, New Mexico, wondering what happened, or do they go back to their home planets? Talk about doubling down on your supernatural phenomena!

Also, if ghosts do exist, then they wouldn’t be “supernatural,” would they? They would be part of nature, not “above” it. Just sayin’.

Some of the more scientifically focused talk about ghosts as historical “echoes” from other times or “vibrations” of alternate dimensions that are running alongside this one. I have yet to read Mary Roach’s Spook (I know, I know!), but it doesn’t seem that accepted science is any closer to answering the question than pseudoscience is.

Ultimately, I would have to say that ghosts exist, real or not, if only because the idea of them have become so ingrained in human existence. Ghosts remind me of a mirage of water on a hot roadway or a rainbow—both are nothing more than optical illusions (light refracting off seeming invisible forces) that rely on the perspective of the viewer, but yet are certainly accepted as “genuine” phenomena even if they don’t really exist because we can “see” them in certain conditions. Could a ghost be a simple trick of the light, bouncing off of something that’s already around us? Hmm …

Maybe ghosts are something that are there just beyond our reach and understanding. Or not. Guess none of us will know for sure until we the opportunity to be one.